Buses

Much like a washing machine, hair dryer and Ranch dressing, having a car was something Ben and I knew we'd be giving up by moving to Brazil. But having relied solely on public transportation in the past (Australia and England), I knew it wouldn't be too bad. And it really hasn't been. Brazil has enough buses running to get us pretty much wherever we need to go.

But that's not to say Brazilian buses are ordinary. No, in the country that always marches to the beat of its own samba drum, the buses -- like everything else -- offer a one-of-a-kind experience that never fails to make for a good story.

The adventure starts with the bus stops. Unlike other countries that have an overhang or bench noting where you can be picked up, here you just have to look for crowds of people standing around looking like they're waiting for something. The city hasn't devised any sort of timetable for these routes, either, so you just press your luck and hope your bus chugs by. When you do see your bus, you have to vigorously flag it down by sticking out and waving your arm. If you don't, it won't stop (which Ben and I learned the hard way).

Getting on the bus, you board at the back and climb up some stairs to a cashier in a chair. After paying, you have to squeeze through a turnstile -- which is fitting, considering the roller coaster of a ride that's in store.

The first time Ben and I rode a bus in Brazil definitely set the tune for all the rides to come. There weren't any seats, and the only space to even stand was in the very back. It was still summer, and there isn't any AC, so we were baking in heat while surrounded by sweaty people with their arms in the air. Nice. But once the bus started moving, it was hard to concentrate on anything other than holding on.

The driver floored it, sending everyone flying back in their seats like a rocket launch. Then, only a few seconds later, we all flew toward the front of the bus when the driver came to the first stop light. We were violently thrown back and forth like this the entire way. But that was only part of the fun. The driver swerved in and out of traffic like he was behind a motorcycle rather than a giant bus. And being in the back, Ben and I were literally bouncing off our feet in the air with every bump. It was honestly a more thrilling ride than almost any roller coaster I've been on. Just imagine the Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland ... except without handle bars, and instead just the actual threat of death. Of course, I loved it.

While we've had a few smoother rides during our time here, each bus seems to be about the same. Ben and I have seen that the drivers will actually race each other from stop to stop, sometimes smiling and joking as they go, other times yelling and shaking fists at each other through open windows. Once our driver even did a burn out when the light turned green. And like the rest of the drivers in Rio, the street laws are optional. Sometimes they stay in their lanes, sometimes they don't. If a car is trying to merge, we don't slow down. He can break if he wants. While Ben and I haven't gotten in any (known) accidents while we were in the bus, we've seen two bus crashes happen before our eyes while walking down the street. None were serious, and everyone acted like it was just another day on the road.

Inside makes from some great people watching, too. Because people can bring beers anywhere they want in Brazil, there always seems to be a group of drunk men riding along with us. Other people listen to headphones -- some of whom choose to sing aloud as they do. My favorite was a young guy who was probably high on drugs (or just high on being a teenager) and sang out loud each word of his music. The best part was that the song was in English, so I got a kick out of hearing how he interpreted the words. Another one of my favorite bus rides was at night leaving the bars. Someone was playing a guitar, and the entire bus, including the driver, sang along.

I wish I could take a picture and showcase the inside of the buses here ... but I was vehemently warned against it. My Brazilian friends told me, and I also read, that buses are a haven for thieves. If a crook sees that you have something nice, like a digital camera, he'll pull a gun and hold up the entire bus. Welcome to my life. It's too bad, because I would love to capture how exciting these rides can be. I guess it just adds to the mystic of it all. Even the buses are exotic in Brazil.